One of my all time favorite movies is "What About Bob." In summary, it is a movie whose main character, Bob Wiley, which, by the way, is also my father-in-law's name, is a very neurotic New Yorker in possession of a laundry list of paralyzing phobias. Bob Wiley hooks up with Dr. Leo (Richard Dreyfus), a New York psychologist whose claim to fame is a book entitled-"Baby Steps." As the title of the book suggests, one can "ditch" their psychoses one small step at a time. I do not think that Bob ever totally achieved his goal of "neurosis removal"...in fact, I think he just transferred his neurotic behavior to Dr. Leo, however, one has to agree, that the idea of transmuting any negative behavior and thus establishing a new one can be much easier to accomplish with the "baby step" method.
The new year is the time when most are setting their resolutions, while not mandatory, the logic behind removing old, irritating behaviors and replacing them with better ones, makes more sense when coinciding with a new year. I would suggest steering clear of resolutions centering around health and fitness if you are expecting miraculous results and tend to be perfectionist in nature. As perfectionists tend to be very self critical, therefore, short circuiting themselves in the process of achieving these resolutions should they not progress in the perfect linear path. To a perfectionistic personality, not achieving the resolutions they set on the new year can be akin to a noose around their proverbial neck. The mainstream populace tend to set very difficult resolutions, ones which inherently can lead to failure, most involve such things as: losing 50 plus pounds in six months, maintaining the fitness level of an olympic athlete, well, you get my drift. What I am suggesting that you consider in setting your resolutions, is that they do not have to center solely around the physical, as by expanding your horizons to the emotional/spiritual, etc., you will have a more positive impact on the physical. Resolution setting is a highly individual process, one which should not be standardized. It is dependent upon one's disposition, consciousness level, motivation, etc. There are, however, some definite steps which one can take to ensure that they achieve their goals/resolutions:
1. Break down into smaller (baby steps), making sure to tell others about your goals and the step you are on (providing the people you tell actually give a "crap").
2. Keep a journal, or a feeling journal, as I call them, as many times our behavior defies logic and the answer to why we do things counter to what we had intended, can be found in how we feel on any given day.
3. One of the most important criteria to consider in the achievement of any goal, is the ability to focus on one's successes, on what you WANT and how it would feel to have what you WANT, rather than on what you do not want. As to focus on what you do not want only will bring in more of that. This is a universal law of energy.
4. Reward yourself often (small rewards) for your successes and make sure to focus on one goal/resolution at a time. Do not consider a "lapse" a failure and bag the entire journey!
5. Be sure to SMILE often and be cognizant and thus grateful for what you do have, as there are many who have less!
What will not work or be enough to make any real change is to give into fear, to think that if you have willpower, that is all it will take, as willpower is a transient human trait.
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